Articles
True Meaning of Discipline
It was only a few years ago that my sister Debbie shared with me the true meaning of the word discipline. It means to teach or instruct. This is one of the key reasons that The Appreciation Station is so successful in homes. We believe that the most effective way to discipline is through consequence. When a child displays desired behavior it is just as important to recognize and respond at that moment, as it is to recognize and respond to undesired behaviors. You are "teaching" your child what works for you and what behavior is appreciated. Once again, you are helping their brain to grow. It is, just as important when a child displays undesired behavior that you act swiftly and intentionally. Most parents can agree on this logic. The problems seem to arrive by way of "inconvenience."
Using your Appreciation Station makes it easy, enjoyable and convenient to recognize and respond to what your child does well. The true inconvenience for many parents seems to become more evident when a child misbehaves. For example, you're at a friend's home for a play date and you set clear expectations for behavior before you left your house. You've spent all of ten minutes together and your child is displaying behavior that is disappointing. You remind him that if he doesn't play nicely, as you spoke about at home, you're leaving. This is a "critical moment" for a purposeful parent. You have spoken and clearly laid out consequences for undesired behavior. Your child must know and understand that your words are TRUTHFUL. If you do anything, other than what you've committed to your words as his parent will carry little to no meaning with him. Empty threats are a detriment to any parent. You ask once and if you speak it, you must follow through.
On a good day, I ask myself before my head hits the pillow, "What did I teach today?"
Some days are better than others for certain. This simple question is always quite revealing for me. I remind myself often that I am my child's teacher, with all I do and speak. My discipline is as meaningful as the love I share. It is confident without being demeaning and consistent, even when it's not convenient for me.
